Work was fine today. I hate the concierge desk. I want to give up those shifts completely.
Early this morning, I received a call at the desk from Stella. She wanted to follow up on our uniform discussion, and asked if I was able to purchase the shirt and pants online. Obviously, I never even looked into that option. Our conversation quickly turned ugly and unpleasant from there.
I didn’t mince my words. I told Stella that I had issues with the uniform, and that I was hoping to talk with her about finding an alternative solution. I also said that I was willing to speak with Lawrence, The Clubhouse’s president, since the uniform was ultimately his decision. Stella acted as though I had shot her first-born child.
“Is it seriously that big of a deal?” Stella asked me. “You can be honest.”
I promised myself that I would not back down.
“Yes,” I responded firmly. “It is.”
I heard Stella let out a very dramatic sigh of defeat through the phone.
“Alright. We can talk about this later,” Stella said before hanging up.
We’ll see what happens. Hopefully, there won’t be any further rebuttal. I’m not changing. Literally.
My shift at the desk ended, and I went home at 5 p.m. Upon arriving at the Witch Cave, I smoked some weed, prepped my outfit for tonight’s Pride party at The Clubhouse, and then took a nap before I had to head back to work.
It turned out that I was a lot more stoned than I thought. I fucked up my alarm timing, and ended up getting to The Clubhouse an hour behind schedule. Fortunately, nobody noticed. After helping Lucy set up a few last-minute items, I punched out and started enjoying the party with my own friends. You know, the ones who actually took the time to respond to my invitation. Dan, Connor, and Evan came, Riley and her sister were there, and Lauryn showed up, too. We mingled together in our own corner of the patio for most of the night, until after 11 p.m.
The Clubhouse has made it very clear that they will not be providing me with benefits. No dental, health, or even a goddamn massage. Therefore, I have decided to take matters into my own hands – I’ve created my own benefits plan. Currently, said plan includes unlimited free toilet paper and napkins. It’s a work in progress. However, I’ve now decided that alcoholic drinks – typically free to begin with – will also be available for the taking. This can occur at the club’s weekly After Hours drink hour, at the bi-monthly Open House social event, or at one-off events like tonight’s Pride party.
Before this evening’s festivities commenced, Lucy gave me at least 25+ drink tickets. My friends and I used them all night. I was smart about it, though. Not once did I visit the bar myself. Instead, I had different guests act as my drink runners to avoid any potential confrontation with the bartenders. What’s the first rule of money? Never spend your own!
The Pride party was a great time. Fuck boys, though. RX never messaged me about the event after our blowout, nor did I find a husband on the dance floor – despite having been in Grindr Limbo with three attendees, maybe more.
“Grindr Limbo” is a term I have just created. This is when you have chatted with someone online, but have never actually met them in person. Grindr Limbo can be very awkward. In some instances, the guy pretends like he doesn’t even know you. It’s so fucking weird, and yet another reminder that people can be completely different from their online personas. I’m not innocent. I didn’t initiate a conversation with a lot of people I knew, either. All I’m saying is that it’s weird.
Tonight, there was a guy I really liked at the party named Colby. We recently started chatting on Grindr, but my patience with him has been wearing thin. Colby initiated a conversation with me online a few days ago, gave me his phone number, and said hello when he saw me this evening. When I tried to connect with him 20 minutes after that in-person introduction, Colby read and ignored my texts. I still haven’t heard back from him. What the fuck, man? Why do you always want the guys who don’t care about you? And why does it hurt the most when those relationships end?
Much to my surprise, Phillip and his friend Tommy ended up coming to the event. I passed them some drink tickets, and they joined our crew in the corner of the patio. We stayed there with our cocktails for the rest of the night, talking as a group and as individuals.
Lauryn couldn’t believe that she was meeting Phillip, nor that I had a brother who was, in her words, “extremely attractive.” Throughout the night, Lauryn kept turning towards me and expressing her disbelief, whispering to me how sexy she thought Phillip was. Later, when Phillip asked me in a quiet voice who Lauryn was, I knew I needed to facilitate a proper introduction. At first, I thought that Phillip was going to get together with Riley or her sister. However, once both of those girls went home, I knew the deal was sealed. Phillip actually turned down both of them for Lauryn. I was very pleased.
Once Phillip and Lauryn had been properly introduced, Phillip offered to buy the three of us some drinks. We all went to the bar, Tommy included. Separately, I gave both Phillip and Lauryn the all-clear to go ahead with what I knew they were both were thinking. Oy. I’m such a yenta!
By this point, it was just the four of us left. Standing from left to right at the bar, it was me, Tommy, Phillip, and then Lauryn at the far end, sitting on a stool. Once we got our drinks and toasted, I started talking to Tommy, who was standing with his back to Phillip’s. As I looked over Tommy’s shoulder, I saw Phillip and Lauryn deeply engaged in conversation. Success!
After talking in our respective couplings a little while longer – Lauryn with Phillip, and me with my new heterosexual boyfriend, Tommy – Lauryn motioned for me to come over to her. Apparently, she was leaving. Umm, what? Why!
Lauryn and I said our goodbyes to the boys, and made our way outside. As Lauryn puffed on a cigarette outside The Clubhouse, she admitted that she wasn’t really leaving – she was going home with Phillip.
I was so happy! I know that sounds like such a strange thing for someone to want for their sibling and friend, but why the fuck not? Lauryn and Phillip are both great people, and I love them both. Why not facilitate that kind of pairing? I’m probably going to eat those words later, but who gives a fuck.
Once Lauryn elaborated on her plan to go back to Phillip’s place, I told her that it was stupid. There was no need for sneaking around. I was the one who hooked them up. I supported this decision! Furthermore, how did Lauryn and Phillip think that they were going to get into a cab together without me seeing them? For my smartest friend, Lauryn’s plan was pretty fucking stupid.
Five minutes later, Phillip and Tommy appeared outside. I openly encouraged Phillip and Lauren to go home together, so they got in a cab and drove off. Tommy and I decided that we would continue drinking, and began wandering in no particular direction. I smoked a full pipe of weed along the way, and then we stumbled upon Java House, which was where we set up shop for the night with two pitchers of sangria. Despite it being 3:30 a.m. as I’m typing this in bed right now, I don’t feel that drunk.
While sipping on our pitchers, Tommy and I talked and bonded over pretty much everything you could think of. Anxiety, tattoos, depression, sexuality, and more. It was a great conversation, and a nice way to spend the night. We just clicked. It was very interesting talking to Tommy. I don’t have many straight guy friends, if any. Naturally, I wanted to marry Tommy. Obviously, that was off the table. I was tempted to push for something more, but I also didn’t want to be “that” gay guy – the one who can’t have relationships with straight men, because he hits on them.
The thing is, I think that everyone is gay. Like, I truly believe that if I had actually tried, I could have at least made out with Tommy tonight. It certainly wouldn’t have been the first time that I made out with a “straight” guy. However, I didn’t want to piss off Phillip. It’s one thing to set up two people who you know are into one another. It’s another thing to lay down moves on someone who doesn’t necessarily want them. No means no. Consent is sexy.
Overall, drinks with Tommy was an excellent nightcap. After walking to Yonge Street together, we parted ways. I took the bus home, and immediately crawled into bed. Tommy and I continued texting throughout the night about being a mutual support to one another, for a variety of reasons. It was nice.
Love ya much.
Goodnight xo
Tonight’s Pride party was Nineties-themed. Can you guess who made the celebrity photo-op cut-outs? Poor Franny. “Oh, Mista Sheffield…!”The Clubhouse, Toronto